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“ROMANCE A LA CARTE” IS A DELICIOUS ALTERNATIVE TO TRADITIONAL RELATIONSHIPS

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By SASHA MAXWELL

Guest Blogger

What if you haven’t found Mr. Right or Ms. Right, but you crave companionship, sex, intellectual compatibility, a spiritual connection, affection, laughter, and fun?

Or, what if you’ve tried monogamy and traditional relationships, but convention smacks of oppression and boredom?

And what if you’re hungering for a new approach to passion and pleasure that will make you feel empowered and free?

Then try Romance à la Carte.

Romance à la Carte means indulging your appetite for every quality you desire in your perfect mate — by savoring a decadent buffet of relationships.

Let’s admit, it’s a rare life occurrence – a miracle, actually – to find EVERYTHING you desire all wrapped up in one person. 

So think of Romance à la Carte as being in the restaurant of life, where the menu fails to offer one entrée containing the exact appetizer, soup, meat/fish, starch, vegetable, salad, dessert, and beverage that you’re craving. 

What do you do? You order your favorite items separately. Got it?

Then let’s begin your crash course in Romance à la Carte by addressing your sexual appetite. I recommend having one outstanding lover who satisfies your most voracious hunger. 

If you need more than one lover (like my friend who has a “pair and a spare” so someone is always available when she needs him) then go for it. That multiplies your rewards – and risks!  We’ll tackle that topic another day.

Now that your libido is being pampered, it’s time to cultivate romantic friendships that fulfill your needs on every other level.  Those needs are everything you want to experience in the soul mate or twin flame whom you have yet to meet. 

So, make a list of those qualities, and you’ll know what to order on life’s menu of flirtatious friendships. 

Need an example?  Check out my “must-haves” for me and Mr. Right:   

·    Intellectual compatibility

·    A deep, timeless, spirit-centered connection that allows us to communicate without speaking, even when far apart

·    A very high energy level

·    Amazing sex

·    An unspoken sense of comfort and safety with zero awkwardness, ever

·    A super upbeat outlook

·    Excellent communication skills and the courage to express one’s deepest desires, fears, pain, and dreams

·    A similar lifestyle (physical fitness, healthy eating, meditation, yoga, journaling)

·    Hilarious humor that makes my abs hurt from laughing so hard

·    Professional success rooted in a deep work ethic

·    Passion for the same music & foods

·    Harmonious traveling habits

·    Like-minded political convictions

·    Solid family values

·    Politeness, diplomacy, social graces

·    Curiosity to learn every day

·    An inner child that’s excited and free to come out to play with mine, especially on a swing set. 

So how’d I come up with Romance à la Carte?  After 10 years of monogamy, I just wanted to have fun.

I loved working out at the gym with Mario, attending plays with Jacob, riding my bike with Nicholas, performing my poetry at clubs and cafés with Blake in tow, eating Thai food with Ricardo, talking about writing with Elijah…

You get the picture.

Of course an extraordinarily skilled special someone took care of my behind-closed-doors desires.    

Over the years, I have mastered the art of Romance à la Carte. 

One challenge is that sometimes the flirtatious friendships deepen and roar toward something physical. That’s when you have to finesse your ability to set and maintain boundaries. 

The reality is, the most hot, rockin’ sex doesn’t happen with everybody. In fact, it can ruin great friendships.  Not worth it, in my book.

So now that you have an overview of Romance à la Carte, I hope you can savor all the flavors and have a blast doing so!

And when you meet the person who embodies all you desire and more, then I wish you the deepest, most decadent lifelong love affair ever.

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© 2017 Sasha Maxwell

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Sasha welcomes your questions, comments, and suggestions for topics you'd like her to discuss. 

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